Saturday, February 21, 2009

I am MIDDLE-MAN dun dun duh

A week ago, Princess High and Mighty went out and got herself grounded. Not a rare occurrence but hey, she lied to Wildcat so she is punished. Eazy-peazy. The way things work at our cave is the person who creates the punishment is the one who controls the punishment.
I am (not by nature but by choice) as honest as I can possibly be. I can, however, appreciate the construction and execution of a well-crafted lie. I will trust you but if you lie to me and expect me to be an idiot about it, then you will get the punishment you deserve.
Anyway – off topic (mind keeps wandering away)
PHM was grounded and told she could not go to “THE DANCE.” She was cool with that because her current “BF” had been suspended so she had no date.
Last night marked the end of her grounding and all of the sudden, yup you guessed it gentle readers, she wanted to go to “THE DANCE”. So I am now used as the middleman as both PHM and Wildcat are incapable of discussing things between each other without both tooth and nail coming out.
PHM texts and calls me (at work) to convince Wildcat to let her go. I, doing my job as part of the parent team, back up Wildcats decision. PHM pleads her case well to me and that her mom isn’t listening to her. I explain to her that she needs to cool her jets, explain the same things to her mom, not me and actually listen to the responses.
I then call Wildcat and get her side of the story. I explain to her that she needs to cool her jets, explain the same things to her daughter, not me and actually listen to the responses.
Back and forth, forth and back it goes like this for about an hour.
Drama, tears, anger, all kinds of emotions are thrown at me across the phone lines. I am bobbing, weaving, deflecting and dodging them like a talk-show ninja.
Just as the smoke starts to clear and I am getting nice and settled in for a refreshing vegetative state, I get one more call. It’s PHM saying that her and Wildcat had talked and she is going to “THE DANCE” and I need to come and get her.

Yes. That’s right! PHM and Wildcat were calling me yet they WERE AT THE SAME PLACE! I was at home and they were both at the In-laws house. Now I had to go to this place and retrieve my daughter and take her to a friends cave to get ready for this dance.

There is no good way to end this epic tale as this is not a rare experience but an ongoing occurrence.
Remind me to tell you about the bowl of cheese.

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Thrill me...dripsome brain droppings here.