Friday, September 27, 2013

Words from your dad


  • Smile and look people in the eye
  • Walk with your head up and have good posture
  • Say “please” and "thank you" a lot
  • Live well beneath your means
  • Study yourself and learn why you do what you do
  • Buy whatever kids are selling on card tables in their front yards
  • Learn something new every day
  • Treat everyone you meet as you want to be treated
  • Don’t take yourself too seriously. Laugh as much as you can
  • Do not worry about what others think of you. What you think of you is what is important
  • Make new friends but cherish the old ones
  • Keep secrets but know when not to. Don’t gossip
  • Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference
  • Use credit cards only for convenience, never for credit
  • Never cheat. A man’s word is all he truly has
  • Do not lie. It is easier to remember the truth then the story
  • Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all he or she has
  • Never take action when you're angry. Think before you act
  • Never shop when your hungry
  • Don't discuss business in elevators. You never know who may overhear you
  • Never pay for work before it's completed
  • Be a gracious loser and a humble winner
  • Never expect life to be fair. It isn’t
  • Never walk out on a quarrel with your wife
  • Listen when your child talks to you.
  • Regarding furniture and clothes: if you think you'll be using them five years or longer, buy the best you can afford. Remember, you get what you pay for
  • Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you'll regret the things, you didn't do more than the ones you did
  • When faced with a serious health problem, get at least three medical opinions
  • Do not be afraid to ask for help. No one can do everything
  • After encountering superior or inferior service, food or products, bring it to the attention of the person in charge. Good managers will appreciate knowing.
  • Work smarter not harder but know when good old fashioned elbow grease is needed
  • Don't be afraid to say "I don't know", "I'm sorry" or “I love you”
  • Admit your mistakes and learn from them. Everyone makes them and you do not learn anything by always doing it right
  • Never humiliate someone. This will make them your enemy for life
  • Don’t live in regret. You cannot change the past, only the future
  • Take lots of pictures. Sometimes the past can get hazy
  • Be the kind of person your dog thinks you are. Never be afraid to be yourself
  • Be proud of who you are. Be the best you that you can be
  • Call your parents, they miss you

Friday, September 20, 2013

Apples



Sometimes when you think you’re buying an Apple you’re really just buying an apple*


Ok for those who don’t want to go and read, I shall sum this up for you.
Lady in Australia wants 2 Apple iPhones so she posts on their local “craigslist” site “hey I want 2 iphones”
She is contacted and told “yeah I can sell you 2 iPhones, it’ll cost you $1200.” 1.
She makes the transaction in a McDonalds parking lot and goes home.
Opening the boxes she discovers that each one contains an apple. 2.
Not an Apple iPhone but an actual apple.
Maybe it was a McIntosh

The cops just said “well isn’t that just too bad.”

I couldn’t do this. I would either be straining really hard not to grin from ear to ear or afterwards stopping her from leaving saying ”no, I can’t. I just can’t. You are too stupid to take advantage of.”





  1. $1200 for 2 iphones!? That’s just a couple of bucks shy of retail.
  1. I don’t even buy food at McDonalds without checking the bag! Why do you drop that amount of money without inspecting the product?




*thanks to Mental Floss for the link

Friday, September 13, 2013

Before I Die


Before I Die
  • Write a Best-seller
  • Win an Award, Trophy or Prize
  • Catch a Fish With Your Bare Hands
  • Make a Discovery
  • Realize Your Childhood Dream
  • Learn a Instrument
  • Leave Your Mark in Graffiti
  • Storm Chase a Tornado
  • Meet Someone with your Own Name
  • Stage Dive or Crowd Surf
  • Own a Pointless Collection
  • Go Up in a Hot Air Balloon
  • Get Arrested
  • See an Erupting Volcano
  • Sky Dive
  • Stay in the Best Suite in a Five Star Hotel
  • Experience Weightlessness
  • See the Aurora Borealis
  • Design Your Own Cocktail
  • Make Fire Without Matches
  • Touch/see or ride These Animals of the Wild...
  • Panda
  • Rhino
  • Hippo
  • Grizzly Bear
  • Elephant
  • Hummingbird
  • Giraffe
  • Koala
  • Manatee
  • Gorilla
  • Monkey
  • Kangaroo
  • Eagle
  • Polar Bear
  • Bat
  • Get a Free Upgrade on a Plane
  • Milk a Cow
  • See Both Solar and Lunar Eclipses
  • Learn Another Language
  • Make at Least One Huge Purchase You Can't Afford
  • Leave a Job You Hate
  • Get Away with the Perfect Practical Joke or Hoax
  • Make the Front Page of a Newspaper
  • Drive a Car at Top Speed
  • Shout 'Drinks Are on Me!' in a Pub or Bar
  • Be Part of a Flash Mob
  • Visit...
  • Colosseum, Rome, Italy
  • Machu Picchu, Peru
  • The Pyramids at Giza, Egypt
  • Sydney Harbour, Australia
  • Great Barrier Reef, Australia
  • Golden Gate Bridge, San Francisco
  • The Alamo
  • Washington DC
  • The Great Wall of China
    Swim With...
    • Sharks
    • Whales
    • Dolphins
  • Save Someone's Life
  • Invent a Word That Makes it into the Dictionary
  • Have Adventurous Sex
  • Have Enough Money to Do All the Things on This List
  • Stand on the International Date Line
  • Get a Tattoo and/or a Piercing
  • Invent Something
  • Learn Astronomy and Read the Night Sky
  • Drink a Vintage Wine
  • Answer a Personal Ad
  • Get Barred From a Pub or Bar
  • Skinny Dip at Midnight
  • Sell Your Junk on eBay and Make a Profit
  • Run a Marathon
  • Conquer Your Fear
  • Own an Original Work of Art
  • Get Something Named After You
  • Get Revenge
  • Be an Extra in a Film
  • Go on a Demonstration
  • Continue Your Gene Pool

Saturday, September 7, 2013

Before I´m Old And Boring

Before I´m Old And Boring

  • Send a Message in a Bottle
  • Run up an Escalator the Wrong Way
  • Make an Origami Crane
  • Learn How to Tell When Someone Fancies You (and When They Don't)
  • Keep a Dream Diary
  • Touch These Creatures
  • Mice and rats
  • Camel
  • Elephant
  • Tortoise
  • Giraffe
  • Butterflies and moths
  • Worms
  • Birds
  • Spiders
  • Snake
  • Frog
  • Fish
  • Some sort of bug
  • Learn to Play an Instrument
  • Play a Computer Game to the End
  • Have an Embarrassing Moment and Get Over It
  • Learn to Whistle (and Make Other Noises)
  • See a Ghost
  • Fart and Burp
  • Make a Swear Jar
  • Act in a Play
  • Win Something
  • Make a T-shirt
  • Stay Up All Night
  • Sleep All Day
  • Invent a Secret Code
  • Learn to Do a Card Trick
  • Grow Something from a Seed
  • Start a Collection
  • Learn to Do a Party Trick
  • Climb to the Top of a Mountain
  • Make a One-Minute Movie
  • Teach a class
  • Host a Party
  • Visit...
  • A safari park
  • A carnival
  • A castle
  • A theme park
  • A farm
  • An aquarium
  • The countryside
  • Another country
  • My capital city
  • Learn to Bake a Cake
  • Hide Treasure and Leave a Map for Friends to Find
  • Start Your Own Blog
  • Write a poem
  • Make a Time Capsule
  • Be a Genius
  • Take Care of an Animal
  • Learn to Like These Foods
  • Broccoli
  • Shellfish
  • Lettuce
  • Brussels sprouts
  • Carrots
  • Smelly cheese
  • Coconut
  • Peas
  • April Fool Someone
  • Do Something Charitable
  • Invent a New Game
  • Go As Fast As You Can
  • Pretend to Be Ill Convincingly
  • Save Your Pocket Money for a Month and Spend It All at Once
  • Succeed At Something You're Bad At
  • Be a Daredevil
  • Know Who Your Friends Are
  • Camp Out in the Back Yard
  • Learn to Live without Something You Love for a Week
  • TV
  • Mobile Phone
  • Junk Food
  • the Internet
  • Join a Club
  • Cook a Meal
  • Make Your Bike or Skateboard Look Cool
  • Learn to Juggle
  • Have a Snowball Fight and Fun in the Snow
  • Take Part in a TV Show
  • Make a Scene in a Public Place
  • Do Something Nice without Being Asked
  • Have a Sleepover
  • Learn to Say Useful Phrases in Other Languages
  • Make Your Own Greetings Cards
  • Hold a garage sale
  • Start Your Own Secret Society
  • Research Your Family Tree
  • Learn to Skim Stones
  • Dye Your Hair
  • Write a Story and Get It Published
  • Sing in Front of an Audience
  • Learn to Use Long Words (and Drop Them into Conversation)
  • Take the Blame for Someone Else
  • Learn to Stick Up for Yourself
  • Get from A to B Using a Map
  • Send a Valentines Card
  • Have Your Own Plot in the Garden
  • Build Your Own Website
  • See Your Name in Print
  • Glue Coins to the Floor
  • Learn to Take Great Photos
  • Drive Something
  • Be Vegetarian for a Week
  • Meet Someone Famous