Tuesday, November 3, 2009

11 Rent a face's

Here you’ll find a list compiled from surveys of several top-of-the-line celebrity event organizers specializing in the “rent-a-celebrity” business. It’s also interesting to note that a celebrity’s “asking price” fluctuates with their popularity, amongst other things, probably because they suddenly realize that no one’s going to pay a stupid amount of for some washed up has-been that’s undergone too many botched surgery ops. So step right up and check out this list of celebs-for-hire, ranging from the exquisitely decadent to the…Er…not so

Tara Reid - $3,500 (used to be $35,000 to $50,000)
American Pie actress Tara Reid has certainly gotten cheaper in the past year or so. Maybe soon she’ll be the same price as the one movie she’s famous for…Which she made almost a decade ago.

Nick Lachey - $60,000 (used to be $100,000)
Just like his ex-wife, Nick’s prices have dropped (although not as considerably) to a slightly more affordable $60k. That’s right folks, for the grand total of $60k, you can have the one and only Nick Lachey doing exactly what he’s famous for, which is…I forget

Jessica Simpson - $75,000 (used to be $400,000)
A few years ago she could command an astonishing $400k, but times have changed and the high prices ended when her marriage to Nick Lachey did. Now she earns only slightly more than he does for making an appearance. A couple more appearances and maybe she will be able to get her boobs to match!

Usher - $175,000 (used to be $1,000,000)
R& B/Pop artist Usher’s stock has recently crashed, most likely due to the possibility that no one really likes him, who knows. Now checking in at a party near you for the relatively low cost of $175k, he used to fetch the princely sum of one million dollars.

Demi Moore - $200,000
Still living the party-filled glory days of her youth (for a price, of course), Demi Moore can swan around talking to your guests for the same price as 40,000 hotdogs. With that price, you would hope that she would provide the baby sitter for her husband.

Scarlett Johansson - $200,000
This famous young actress now allegedly accepts $200k for being able to turn up at your party, eat your food, drink your drink and then leave.

Pam Anderson - $250,000 (used to be $75,000)
The two things that made Baywatch watchable can make an appearance at a party of your choosing for only $250k, being a considerable amount greater than the $75k she used to ask for. You must pay an additional 10k for her to keep her clothes on during the event.

Nicole Kidman - $500,000 + A jet
Famous actress Nicole Kidman can show herself at your party for the modest amount of half a million. Oh and you’ll most likely have to pay the shipping and handling for this particular item in the form of a private jet flight over to your place. Most party fun consists of holding her up to the light to see what she had for lunch.

Dr. Phil - $750,000 to $1,000,000
For the price of an incredible house,you too can listen to whatever it is that Dr. Phil has to say. You just better make sure that whatever he’s saying will be the most amazing things ever before you contribute to his $30 million a year salary. For an additional fee you will be allowed to beat him with sticks and throw small bits of fruit at him.

Mariah Carey - $3,000,000 (used to be $1,000,000)
A few years ago, a private performance from infamous diva Mariah Carey would have set you back a mere cool million. However, nowadays a show will cost you triple that amount AND you’d have to put up with her weird demands for a room filled with puppies or whatever

Kylie Minogue - $2,000,000 to $4,000,000
Depending on which sources you believe, Kylie was paid an incredible amount of cash to perform a 40 minute set at the Hotel Atlantis at a resort in Dubai earlier this year.

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Thrill me...dripsome brain droppings here.