What am I?

I was thinking about what the perfect job would entail.

Now number one is obviously the time honored skill of pondering. 

Since this entails me just doing whatever I please and randomly thinking about a subject, that's kinda a small exclusive market there but I am still looking. By looking I mean squeezing my eyes real tight and singing Twinkle-twinkle lil star.

In the chance that this job has already been filled I was thinking about what would be "optimal" for my world.

Criteria: 

Pays around $50 an hour starting or about 50k a year. Hey I have mouths to feed gotta hit the ground running.

20 - 25 hours a week. 9 to 1 is optimal and Mon-Fri of course.
   Full benefits including 2 weeks vacation and 2 weeks sick pay a year.

Minimal schooling (see : hit the ground running)

No moving.  No traveling.
   Minimal human interaction.
   No selling. No Commission basis. If you make your life that way, more power    to you. I couldn't sell a starving man a saltine.
   No risk. Well, ok as secure as can be in today's world.
   No sweating. No lifting. Bad back and all that. Walking is ok.

That's basically it. 

Now just have to find the job that fits the bill. 

twinkle-twinkle lil star