Exile

Last night was my first night back after an imposed 1 week exile from the internet.
Yeah well ok the cable gets shut off when you miss a couple of months.
I wasn't in any big hurry though as I realized early on that I really was not missing anything.
I was able to *gasp* find other things to do.
In fact, if I didn't need it for my job there is a pretty good chance I wouldn't have been so eager to get it back. Sure I missed out on some important things when I needed to do them.
Not many though.
Sure I had a few nights when I was floundering around thinking there was something I was supposed to be doing but couldn't quite put my finger on it.
Small bits of shiny tinfoil and jangling car keys in front of my face made those thoughts dissipate quickly enough.
It was nice seeing the faces of my family again instead of just the tops of their heads as their faces were buried in their iPods, laptops and TV shows. I'm no angel (or angle, whichever) though I gotta admit I spend more time than I thought I did staring off into the electroincal abyss.
It's easy to not go online if you are actually doing something where it is not available like camping or whatever. Not really a big challenge in that your mind is otherwise occupied with lots of other stuff.
Try it for a week when you have nothing else on your plate and see how you fair.
When there is nothing standing between you and the tossing of flatware at the wall to see what interesting patterns emerge.
Try to avoid the MYFace stumbleupon yahoobing googleytubeing trap-hazard that lurks beneath the keyboard then.
I am going to do it more often... right after I answer all my email.

Animalistic

I like animals, well most animals* that is. not a big fan of cats but I can spend the night stroking one just cause I like animals.I went hunting a couple of times and realized that
1. There was no challenge here for me. I was/am naturally a really good shot. Dont know how or why, just am. So stalking around a meadow at dawn with a shotgun looking for a bird to shoot didnt really fall into my catagory of fun.

2. I realized that the prospect of an animal out doing its animal thing suddenly getting really scared and then having its head blown off didn't really sound fair to me. Animals think a lot more then we give them credit for. They think, they feel, they have emotions and there is really nothing that can be said that would make me think any different. You can go to just about anywhere on the internet and find a video of an animal thinking it through. I dont think they have the disneyesque style of being, where they stand around in human clothes and discuss quantum physics while licking their ass but the rudimentary basics are there.
This made me sad.

What's on your mind? I died today. You got tired of me and took me to the shelter. They were overcrowded and I drew an unlucky number. I am in a black plastic bag in a landfill now. Some other puppy will get the barely used leash you left. My collar was dirty and too small, but the lady took it off before she sent me to the Rainbow Bridge . Would I still be at home if I hadn’t chewed your shoe? I didn’t know what it was, but it was leather, and it was on the floor. I was just playing. You forgot to get puppy toys. Would I still be at home if I had been housebroken? Rubbing my nose in what I did only made me ashamed that I had to go at all. There are books and obedience teachers that would have taught you how to teach me to go to the door. Would I still be at home if I hadn’t brought fleas into the house? Without anti-flea medicine, I couldn’t get them off of me after you left me in the yard for days. Would I still be at home if I hadn’t barked? I was only saying, “I’m scared, I’m lonely, I’m here, I’m here! I want to be your best friend.” Would I still be at home if I had made you happy? Hitting me didn’t make me learn how. Would I still be at home if you had taken the time to care for me and to teach manners to me? You didn’t pay attention to me after the first week or so, but I spent all my time waiting for you to love me. I died today. Love, Your Puppy Please repost if ur against ANIMAL ABUSE

*Chickens are evil incarnate and KFC is doing the world a service.

13-year-old armed robber pictured brandishing a shotgun during terrifying 10-day robbery spree - mirror.co.uk

Wow... just wow.
Im so glad this is not my child but
To be proud of my parenting skills because my 13 year old son isnt out robbing stores and taxis is such a grand gesture that it loses all value.
like saying "well sure the house blew up but no one died."



13-year-old armed robber pictured brandishing a shotgun during terrifying 10-day robbery spree - mirror.co.uk

Damn Ego

My darling girl
who made me so proud the other day by waking me up at 3 am in the morning to tell me she just watched the seasonal finale of Doctor Who and sincerely loved it has me in quite the quandary.
She is having issues with her boyfriends* parents and in her detailing the issues lets slip that she thinks I have had but 1 girlfriend in my entire life.
Oh the humanity!
I think she feels that I am such a geek/dork that I couldn't land a girl "back in the day"
The daddy in me says to let it slide and the less she knows the better
However, the male ego in me is quite affronted.
I have had plenty of girlfriends and by girlfriends I mean sexual conquests of course.
I have had quite a number of women in my time.
Why in my high school days I dated a couple of older women in their 20's.
I dated older women, younger women and same aged women.
I've had them fight over me and I've had them lavish me with gifts and vie for my attention.
I have also had those who wished me dead and burning in hell before the end of the day.
I was a lothario back in the day but not a player, or playa.
I respected each one and wasnt out to just get some tail.
OK maybe I was with some but hey I was young and male so that gives me a free pass for being an immature moron being lead around by his dick.
I even gave advice to other males based upon my experiences.
basically summed up to "stop looking so hard. it'll happen when it happens"
Granted those days are way, way in the past and I doubt I could land a chick today but that is age and experience talking.
It's not really a situation I give much to any thought to.
Well till now.
Really?... 1 girlfriend?
Damn ego.



*damn gingers

How can you call it heaven if there aint no dogs there?

BARANGAY LAPASAN (Philippines)

Mar 1, 2007

The children in the Fronteras household refer to their dog as "kuya" ("big brother"), and he certainly proved it on the day he sacrificed his life to protect the family. On Monday, Feb. 12 at around 2 p.m., "Chief", an American Pit Bull Terrier, rescued Liberata la Victoria, 87, and her granddaughter Maria Victoria Fronteras from a deadly cobra which had entered their house through an opening in the kitchen.

Liberata la Victoria and Chief had been watching TV on the sofa when suddenly Chief jumped up and alerted her to the presence of a cobra less than 10 feet away. Maria

Victoria rushed in and pulled her grandmother into a separate room, hoping the snake would leave. But when Maria Victoria later emerged from the room, she was terrified to find the cobra poised about two feet away. Equally startled, the cobra expanded its hood and appeared to be spitting venom as it prepared to strike.

"The snake was in front of us, maneuvering a deadly attack," says Maria Victoria. "I screamed out loud to ask for help." That's when from "out of nowhere", Chief dashed between the cobra and the two women, using himself as a shield against the cobra's attacks. Chief then seized the cobra by the neck and slammed it into the floor, killing it.

But for Chief it was a Pyrrhic victory. In the struggle, he sustained a fatal bite to the jaw, and moments later he began gasping for breath and collapsed. The family sought the help of a veterinarian, but they were told that nothing could be done. According to the vet, the bite was too close to Chief's brain, and the venom had already spread. Maria Victoria called her husband Marlone who, stunned by the news, rushed home immediately.

Ian de la Rama, a friend of the family, says it was less than 30 minutes from the time Chief had been bitten that he "went wobbly and lost control of his organs," 2 urinating and defecating uncontrollably. Yet he still kept clinging to life.

It wasn't until Marlone arrived that Chief finally let go. Ian de la Rama describes, "Chief gave his two deep breaths and died. He was fighting and saving his last ounces of breath to see a glimpse of his master for the last two seconds of his life.

Ian adds that the last thing Chief did as he gazed up at Marlone was wag his tail.

"You think dogs will not be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us."

Robert Louis Stevenson (1850-1894)

The best python sketch

Know the basics

I am pretty hard on myself when it comes to my kids.

I have myself pretty convinced that I am being a neglectful father and to be honest I know I can still do better than I am. I really want to do everything with my kids but when the opportunities arise I am plopped in front of the PC or the TV and out to lunch. I don’t actively choose these options over spending time with my kids it is mostly a energy thing.

Wiped out from a long day at work it is difficult to locate that extra Omph I need to get out and actually do something.

I ran across this basic list of things every child should know how to do. While it is not all inclusive of course it does set a rather good base as to some functions a kid can be taught that can transfer over to a real world experience:

1. CPR and basic first aid.
2. Know how to tie Basic Useful Knots
3. Know how to swim.
4. Know how to ride and fix a bike.
5. Know how a combustion engine works, how to change a tire, how to change the oil in their vehicle and properly dispose of it, how to jumpstart a vehicle, how to change the air filter.
6. Be able to build a fire (bonus points: build a fire without matches or a lighter).
7. Be able to set up a tent, build a lean-to, collect and purify water.
8. Be able to navigate with a map and compass.
9. Understand how the toilet works. Be able to fix and replace the basic components in the tank. Know how to shut off the water supply (for any piece of plumbing, including for the whole house).
10. Understand how the house electrical system works. Know basic electrical safety. Know where the breaker panel is, be able to flip a tripped breaker, know how to use a volt stick. Advanced: be able to replace a simple wall outlet.
11. Understand basic conditional logic in computer programming. Write a “Hello World” statement in one or two programming languages.
12. Understand basic sewing techniques, including the straight and whip stitch.
13. Know how to solder
14. Know how to safely handle fireworks, explosives, and propellants.
15. Know how to safely handle power tools. Know how to safely sharpen tools and knives.
16. Be able to identify the flora and fauna in our area. For the flora: know what’s edible and how to prepare it, and if necessary, the fauna, too

Then I realized…My kids already know how to do some of these maybe less then ½.

They may not be MacGuyver* in all their abilities but they could do them if they needed to.

Maybe I aint so bad after all?

*and yes MacGuyver is indeed the average against which all abilities are weighed. Basically if you can take an ordinary ability/knowledge/skill or talent and you know it so well you can twist it into a whole different set of skills, well then you have MacGuyvered.